Friendship

Can I leave God out?

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 My friend said to me a couple of weeks ago “don’t bring God into everything”. We were talking about his Business Ventures and a career path for him. 

 I have not been able to put that statement to rest. It keeps coming back to me. 

I can’t remember how I replied him, but I know I said something like we could not leave God out.

As I keep thinking about it,  I realise that his statement was  was an echo; a reverb. He was speaking his mind, but he echoed the minds of many others.  

Can I leave God out of anything? No I can not. He is in everything. Everything was created by Him. It would be foolhardy to try and take the creator out of the creature and expect that I would get full expression from the creature. 

Let me rephrase, when a person does not acknowledge God as an integral part of their relationship with people or events or things, they are bound to receive less than it meets their desires.

The full expression of an individual’s  ability is only attainable when he is aware and walks in the knowledge of the God factor.

You see, this my friend was at a cross Road; he was making an important life decision. What to do with his life? And he wanted to leave The Giver of Life out of the decision making process. It/he would have been disaster. He was about to do a trial an error test; an open window to frustration.

Actually, my friend is aware of the God factor, but like many in his shoes, he is not ready to walk in that knowledge. 

When you are aware of the “Boss” status of a person and fail to align or submit your self to his authority, you would have declared yourself an antagonist of him. 

If you know God is LORD, and don’t submit your self to his Lord ship you are walking on ice. 

Not able to recollect the things I said, I have decided to share some of what I remember and a bit of additions. 

I said “make your decisions but lay them before God. And if you are not sure which is which, lay it all before Him and ask for guidance. This means you would pray. Pray like your answer depends on it, because it does. In addition you would align your self with him. Let Him mentor you; show you things. Study His life and see how you can begin to be like Him. His life you would find in the Bible. 
And above all make yourself worthy of the friendship you desire. Let your character be like His.”

He went “Seun, I pray. I read my Bible when I can.” 

That’s the thing. Then God would answer you when He can. He would be available to you when He feels so. 

I wanted to tell him, you haven’t been able to keep a steady relationship in six years, because you don’t put your girl first. And then you think The God who created the girl who left you because, you put her second place would answer to your one minute grunts. Hian!  I did not. I could not. I would have  missed the opportunity. 

So I said to him you know how you were crossed with Ope ( not real name) cos she was seeing someone else, while she was with you. You thought she was not serious. And you walked away. And then when you met Titi ( NRN)‎, she would complain about how you don’t make time for her. You only see her when you are on your home from having been with us all day. 

“What does this have to do with what we are talking about” 
he said. 

Ignoring His question I went on. You left Ope because she was not into you. She only liked the idea of being with someone all her friends were talking about. You left Titi cos she was asking to be first and not second fiddle to you and your guys. And you could not stand being with Toby anymore because she was not honest about certain things in the beginning of your relationship. I paused, trying to catch my breath.

 “IGE, IGE why you dey quite now” came through. 

I answered, God wants the same things the girls I mentioned (to name a few) wanted and what you too wanted from Toby.

1. A real relationship. One that pleased both partners.

2. First place. Not second. Not,when-I-am-going-to-bed relationship. Priority status.

And 3. Honesty. No lies, no games. Straight and straight all through.  

Checking to see if I was speaking to myself, I asked, “what do you think?”

He sighed. So I continued, “take sometime this week and weigh your options. If you think you can adjust and make things right with God, good for you. You are the one who needs adjusting not God. You. But this time, you are lucky. 

I heard him ask “lucky, how?” 

Taking my time, I said, “God is patient. He is willing to help work on your relationship with him. He understands.”

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For friends and friends of Olumide Ayinde HYDE

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            Precious in the sight of the LORD is the death of his saints.- Psalm 116:15

 

On wednesday, 26 March, 2013, at about 10pm, I turned on my phone. As it is always, I went straight for BBM updates. The Personal messages and display pictures of my RUN friends did not correlate. It still does not. 

The picture of someone I was familiar with from afar was on display. But the PM’s, for all I cared was for someone else. I thought, maybe my friends were yet to upload the pictures. Though the thought of having lost a friend saddened me.

My memory came into play. Our interspersed conversations became palpable. I went back to the PM’s hoping my friends had uploaded the real pictures. I enlarged DP’s. Still same. I doubted the logicality to what was now real. It is not like I have the power to dictate what is and what is not; but the realization that this particular “friend” Olu was gone was disheartening. I thought life cruel.

I fairly knew him, but I and Olumide had mutual friends. So, from my conversations with him and friends I can say Hyde had a calm and peaceable mien. I know he spoke softly. He had a light around him that reflected in his friendships. Hyde was a charismatic person. 

I remember my first few interactions with him. We shook hands and exchanged pleasantries. One would think “he was being proud”. I would later learn that he was just the kind of person who was calm in front of a storm. He exuded maturity that I sought.

Memories of Olumide with mutual friends, whether it was in the hostel room, or in front of the lab, coming from the cafeteria or at chapel will forever remain with me.  

Our mutual friend, Toyin, brought me my last moments with him. Her pictures of them both and in some cases with other friends of ours while on orientation camp in Oyo State served as my last moments. Even on that camp via those pictures Hyde’s loving and cool self was not misplaced.

Our last real contact was during our convocation. The conviviality that came with staying at the International Guest House on camp, and other convocation moments are relived as I write this.

Nothing else shows the kind of person Hyde was than how he exited this chaotic world. 

Tomiwa Koleade’s PM kept ringing in my head, “what could have happened in that sleep?”. We would never know what happened in that sleep. Hyde and God his maker alone understand and know the last few moments of his existence. 

My friends, I started out to write a tribute to Olumide but moments have turned. They always turn. My personal reflections have crept in. So as we mourn and miss our dearly beloved, let us think on these things:   

For those who saw him the weekend before, did it seem like Hyde deserved death the last time you were with him? And those who spoke to him the day or night before and had a chat with him, did it cross your mind (for one second) it would be the last time?  

For the moments we shared with friends, I can say Hyde lived a calm life.

Friends, I am learning that for every breath I take, I am one day closer to my death. That every moment spent is my last opportunity to (show) love and be good. 

We are only here but for a short while. And the length of that time is not known to us. I implore that we use the energy of our youth to do good and be right in the Lord.

As Dami Oluyele’s dad, rightly says 

“Sorry folks, I feel you guys; But he’s finished his course! He’s handed over to you. How many souls are you going to impact positively when you are gone? After-life is real… You can have a designer after life…which ever way you choose while you are on this side of life! Take courage the holy spirit will comfort you.”

It is only right that we mourn Hyde for he will sorely be missed. Memories are all we have left of him. Sweet memories. 

Friends, in the words of Apostle Paul, I say, “not that I have already obtained it or have already become perfect, but I press on so that I may lay hold of that for which also I was laid hold of by Christ Jesus. Brethren, I do not regard myself as having laid hold of it yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead… “(Phil 3:12-13)

To the family, my special thoughts and heart felt prayers are with you in this time of sorrow. 

To friends and friends’, I am sending you a hug and love through this note. I wish you peace and healing.  

May the Lord our God keep us all. Amen.

Olumide Ayinde HYDE, sun re o. 

 

‘Seun IGE